What’s Wrong With The Bible? 4/23/08 -Now He’s Just Talking Out Of His Ass.

Alright, this time we’re going to look at a particularly absurd moment in the Old Testament.  Let’s just dive right in.
Numbers 22:28-30:
“28And the LORD opened the mouth of the ass, and she said unto Balaam, What have I done unto thee, that thou hast smitten me these three times?

29And Balaam said unto the ass, Because thou hast mocked me: I would there were a sword in mine hand, for now would I kill thee.

30And the ass said unto Balaam, Am not I thine ass, upon which thou hast ridden ever since I was thine unto this day? was I ever wont to do so unto thee? and he said, Nay.”

Ok, I’m just gonna say it: He’s having a conversation with a fucking donkey!  As if we needed any more of a reason to think that the Bible was just a bunch of fairy tales.  Now, most people would probably freak out when a donkey starts talking to them.  Not this guy, though.  No, he doesn’t even miss a beat and proceeds to threaten to kill the donkey.  I’m just wondering when we’re going to see a plucky young bunny and his dopey but lovable pig sidekick break out into song.

Starbix
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